Autumn, when young woman’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of fashion, and young woman’s handbag can no longer accommodate a fashion magazine, because they’re all four times the size they usually are.
I don’t know if you read all the magazines, but I have subscriptions to a bunch. (They practically give them away these days!) I’m always excited to get a new one, and I usually read them immediately, but the September issues are so thick this year, I have a backlog. The coffee table tray where I keep them weighs about 30lbs at this point.I felt like I needed a lectern to read my September Vogue comfortably. It took two hands to squeeze it out of my tiny mailbox. Vogue always has to be the biggest, and I’m sure they think they’re the best, though I do feel it’s written for a different lady than me. A lady with waaaayyyy more money, and a life that is very different than mine. Still, it’s a classic, and I feel like I need to stay informed. I’m more of a Harper’s Bazaar or Elle girl, and Allure, of course. They had a four-page article on nail art this month.
It does seem though, there is a special list of words that all the fashion and beauty writers (as well as the people at J.Crew) must be required to use and overuse. There’s probably a secret list somewhere, that they hand you when you get hired, and make you promise to use one or more of these words/phrases in each article you write. This month, I’ve been compiling my own list as I see them, because they go off like alarms now.
I’m so sick of them! They just seem insincere. They have no meaning anymore, which is why I don’t use them. And if I do, it’s rare, and it’s because I’m genuinely freaking out about how awesome something is. Or, it’s because I’m making a joke. So here they are, in no real order, except the first one. Feel free to leave your own in the comments:
Genius
(Something) essentials
Must-have
Stock up on
The only (insert whatever) you’ll ever need
We’re obsessed
The perfect (blank)
Celebrity (stuff)
We can’t get enough
The (blah-blah) you need right now
(Some kind of) Staples
Cult-favorite
The (number)(doo-dads) we can’t live without
(This) is the new (that)
It’s not that I don’t like reading about these things; a lot of times, I’m really interested in the stuff they’re talking about. It’s just THOSE PHRASES. Some of them I’m just tired of, but others are just so gross. I mean, we all know that the advertisers are the reasons these people have jobs, and they need to promote the products in the magazines and talk about how great they are in order to keep the advertisers happy/paying. Magazines, especially in September, may seem like they are 75% ads, but they’re really more like 98% ads if you really think about it. Even the interviews are self-promotion.
Still, I’m okay with that, because I want to know about the newest stuff, and I want to stay on top of what’s out there. It’s mostly the urgency, and the thinly veiled motive of “sell, sell, sell” that get to me. Also: Seriously, can you maybe think of another word than genius? Is it really GENIUS to hide a sharpener in the end of the eyeliner pencil? No, it’s CLEVER, it’s CONVENIENT, it’s HANDY.
Anyway, magazines are great, and I love them, but you know where to go for an honest opinion. ;)
Happy Fall Fashion Season!
"The perfect ___" and "Must-have ___" are hands-down my least favorites, in that order. I'm at a point where I involuntarily cringe when I see the former. And as much as I love JCrew, they might be the worst offender.
ReplyDeleteJ.Crew and their "We want one in every color" almost made the list, but I think they're the only offender.
Delete"Investment" for anything other than an actual investment is my bugaboo. $700 for a Chanel skirt is not an investment; it's money spent on a skirt. Put that $700 into a nice, boring, reliable stock and get back to me.
ReplyDeleteGood one! I just read one of those interview-y type things with some model or something, talking about her "it list" for fall, and she used "investment" TWICE.
DeleteVery true. I just read on a blog written by a web journalist that she forbids her team to use "chic" "sexy" and "cool" because they don't mean anything anymore.
ReplyDeleteI must say that I became tired of women's magazines, they are quite vain (and expensive in Switzerland). I almost stopped buying them because I felt that I put way too much money in them.
However, I started reading a fantastic british magazine, Monocle. It seems like their target is a wealthy, older guy but I don't care, I love the content and the layout! It's about everything new and innovative, from style to politics, economics, travels or culture.
The women's mags can be totally depressing too, if you're in the wrong state of mind. I cancelled all my subscriptions once a few years ago, but now I'm back. Plus, in the U.S., many of the magazines are only $13 or so for a year's subscription.
DeleteI've heard about Monocle, I'll have to check it out!
Yes it's good that they are so cheap! In Switzerland, French Vogue is around 9 or 10$ for 1 copy, French Elle is 4.50, and swiss magazines are around 6$!! So you would spend your annual magazine budget in 1 or 2 months. that's crazy!
DeleteWell, the newsstand prices are higher, probably around 4 or 5 bucks, depending on the magazine. But subscriptions are super cheap!
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