December Birchbox

My December Birchbox arrived, and I think it’s one of the most exciting ones of the year. It’s definitely one of the most cohesive, not that that's really important, but it IS nice. It has a holiday theme, and it’s pretty cute.

Did somebody say CUTE?

This is Spike, he's "helping." He's also a camera-hog. Every time I try to take a picture of something, he's mugging for the camera.

Instead of the normal postcard listing the goodies, they did a holiday card with snowflakes and the words “frolic & fancy” on the front. Inside it has the normal list of stuff, along with a holiday message and info about a charity they are working with. (All month Birchbox is donating 100% of the profits from full-size sales to Baby Buggy, with a guaranteed contribution of $25,000.) They also included a small card offering $20 off any full-size order over $75 as a holiday gift to members, good during December. I’m confused though, because doesn’t that cut into the Baby Buggy donation? It’s a good thing they got that guarantee.

Anyway, here are the fun things I got this month:

Benefit Cosmetics The POREfessional
A pore-camouflaging primer that you can use both under AND over makeup. I have a million primer samples, but I am still interested.

Blinc Eyeliner
This is really neat and I didn’t even know it existed. It’s a liquid eyeliner that they say forms a water-resistant “layer of color” that contours to your eyes. Allegedly, since it’s “not a cosmetic paint,” it cannot fade, smude, run or flake. EVEN IF YOU CRY OR RUB YOUR EYES. Fascinating! I’ll do an official review soon. Haha. It has the line "Slides off like a second skin!" on the packaging. Oookay!

Harvey Prince Ageless
The tagline is “The scent of youth”, which instantly reminds me of Debbie Gibson Electric Youth with the hot pink plastic spiral in bottle. Wait a minute, it says “we craft exceptional fragrances that empower women to feel young, happy, slim, and beautiful.” You can SMELL slim? What does that smell like? Celery? Cucumbers? Vomit? According to Harvey Prince, it smells like pink grapefruit (okay, that makes sense), pomegranate and jasmine. It also smells like a 5lb bag of pink sugar. Plus, there is a cartoon lady holding balloons on the front. I don’t think there is anything Ageless about this. Maybe they should have named it Tween?

Jouer Moisturizing Lip Gloss in Birchbox Pink
Jouer made a special lipgloss color just for Birchbox! Unsurprisingly, it’s fuchsia. Surprisingly, it’s not really all that bold. It goes on very sheer and has a nice texture and no flavor. You can increase the intensity by adding another layer, but it’s never going to get as intense as it looks in the tube, which is fine, because it’s a very wearable color. And speaking of the tube, it’s itsy bitsy! You could stash it anywhere: A clutch, the coin pocket of your jeans, a peanut shell, wherever!

ShowStoppers Designer Fashion Tape
Double-sided fashion tape to ensure your fashion stays in place. ‘Tis the season!

EBoost Orange Natural Energy Booster
Who couldn’t use a boost of energy this time of year? You add the packet to water to make an effervescent drink full of “vitamins, minerals and super-nutrients that deliver a boost of energy and immunity.” I want super-nutrients! Also, everyone is coughing and sneezing all over the place, so anything that boosts immunity is okay by me. I saw a lady coughing on the subway yesterday without even covering her mouth! She looked like a goat, hacking with her tongue sticking out. Let’s remember to cough into our sleeves, always. (Unless you’re an extremely quick draw with a fresh, clean tissue.)